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Go to my website (url="http://"http://www.themachacker.cjb.net")http://www.themachacker.cjb.net(/url) and click on Projects to have a look at the story for my upcoming RPG called Kontnia. Please telll me what you think.
Whatever your main page may say, you don't have "a lot of information" yet. But you do have a good start.
Please proofread more carefully; people will think much more highly of your work and ideas if you express them articulately and correctly.
The storyline seems rather clichéd to me. Something to ask yourself: What makes my story different from the others? What can I point to and say "This makes my game unique" or "This was my idea"?
Do you really need "Humans, Elves, Dwarves, and Orcs"? Or could they just as easily be new races of your creation? In other words, do you need the stereotypical elvish/dwarvish/orcish traits to hold your world together, or are you mostly using just the names?
I look forward to seeing your game evolve!
------------------ Back in my day, we didn't have any of this here UBB nonsense. It was DiscBoard or nothing, and we liked it! "In all matters of opinion, our adversaries are insane." - Mark Twain "The answer is yes or no , depending on the interpretation." - Albert Einstein
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Originally posted by Glenn: **1) Whatever your main page may say, you don't have "a lot of information" yet. But you do have a good start.:)
**
: :pulls out his rubber stamp and smack Glenn in the head::
"HATER"
------------------ I'm that man that squats out of jeeps and vans, jump from rof to roof on the TV cam....
Originally posted by chill_rx: **:: pulls out his rubber stamp and smack Glenn in the head::
Er, thanks, I think. I did my best to be constructive... I didn't do as others (especially on the EV image gallery) have occasionally done, saying "Your work sucks. Give it up, loser." Instead, I sought to offer specific points of advice and encouragement. I do see some seeds of a good game in there; it just needs more development.
So Chill, what're your thoughts on this fellow's work?
hater is by no means a compliment. And instead of saying HATER, why not use this creative phrase?
"Don't player hate, participate"
well anyways, now that that is out of my system... Is there anything really all that wrong with having a race of pointy eared skinny people?
------------------ Evil is as evil does. I'm not evil, I'm just corrupt.
Originally posted by Lorenoth: **Is there anything really all that wrong with having a race of pointy eared skinny people? **
If you have a good reason for having them, no. If some group in your game needs pointy-earedness to set them apart from the rest of the humans (which, I'm sure you're aware, are quite a diverse group themselves), fine. If you're including "elves" because you want a comfortable, "classic-fantasy" feel to your world, that's fine too.
But if you're including elves and orcs just so that you can say "Elves are good, orcs are evil, I have a storyline here", I find that a bit of a cop-out. Why aren't there any evil elves? Why no good orcs? Why do they hate each other so much? Why couldn't this just be, say, two rival human nations in a similar conflict? In short, what is there about orcishness and elfitude that is so essential to your storyline?
Of course, this is just a pet peeve of mine; maybe none of the rest of you have a problem with it. I would just like to see RPGs with a bit more dimension to them.
(htjyang stands up on his high horse and salutes Glenn. )
Well said! I couldn't have said it better myself. Indeed, you made practically every point that can be made. I'll see if I can build upon the foundation you provided:
Beeblebrox, the bottomline is try to be creative. Glenn certainly made some very interesting suggestions that are worth looking into. Be spontaneous. Surprise the players.
Maybe half way through, the player will discover that the Elves are actually malicious beings who has been plotting genocide against the Humans. Maybe the player will discover that the Orcs are actually good people who have been trying to help the humans in their own way but their efforts had been hampered by the evil Elves who have very good publicity agents. Maybe the Elves engaged in a propaganda campaign to discredit the Orcs.
In other words, changing the names is cosmetic. Making the plot exciting and unpredictable is what separates good from bad games.
By the way, why did you state so plainly that only the good side can win? Indeed, I challenge somebody on this webboard to actually make a game in which only by being thoroughly evil can the player win. By thoroughly evil, I mean stabbing the backs of friends, massacring peasants, burning down their villages, stealing their money and food, poisoning their wells,...etc.
When was the last time somebody played an RPG in which being 100% evil is the only way to win? I'll bet that since most people prefer to be on the good side, such an RPG will truly be an engrossing one. After doing everything proper, the player is led down a path that ultimately leads to his destruction. The player will be confused. He will go back and retrace his steps. It'll take him some time before he was forced to accept that being pure evil is the only way to win. That RPG will be one people will spend a lot of time trying to figure out and thus a lot of time playing it.
Anybody wants to take up my challenge?
------------------ "Facts are stubborn." - John Adams "Football combines the 2 worst features of America. It is violence punctuated by committee meetings." - George Will The above quotes are courtesy of George Will on ABC's "This Week"
hey thanks for the comments
I've totally changed the story with my own races except for Humans and Elves. I love Elves.
And yes, you discover that the Elves are actually evil and were involoved in Montax's freakish experiments.
Originally posted by htjyang: **By the way, why did you state so plainly that only the good side can win? Indeed, I challenge somebody on this webboard to actually make a game in which only by being thoroughly evil can the player win. By thoroughly evil, I mean stabbing the backs of friends, massacring peasants, burning down their villages, stealing their money and food, poisoning their wells,...etc.
Well, I have actually tried something like that in a Blades of Exile scenario, and let me tell you, forcing the player to accept something they don't want to is not a good idea.
It goes the way you said, except after they've been forced to accept the facts they feel cheated and decide they didn't have much fun at all. Not a good thing if you want people to play your game.
There is a way this can work, though. If your game is trying to prove something, or you have a strong message. Then the player feels that is the only outcome there could be, and accepts it.
------------------ You're never too old to be a Super Mario fan.