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Prologue: Its the year 2300. The galactic civil war has now been going on for 21 years. Weary of war, and too bitter to resolve the mater diplomatically, the Confederation and Rebellion are now looking for new ways to stop the fighting.
Confed scientists are looking into new weapons, better ship designs, and now hyperspace technology. Other Confed admirals have resorted to hiring mercenaries, and paying pirates large sums of money to assassinate high ranking officials. Against the wishes of civilians, captains, and admirals, the Confederation has even begun work on biological weapons.
On the other side, Rebel scientists are working hard on better ship designs and new weapons. While assassins try to assassinate key Confed admirals, Rebel captains and admirals try to persuade independent systems to join the Rebellion. To top it off, Admiral Davies has ordered a new offensive, which is already under way...
Chapter 1: Century
"Hey Mark. How ya doin?"
"Fine," Mark replied. "Hear about my promotion?"
"Hey, who hasn't heard Here take this. I got it on Clotho Prime, and tweaked it a little," said Captain Lewis Steele. Lewis, 26 and six feet tall, had been a friend of Mark's for about five years. He lived on Sirgil III, and was also an expert on weapons.
Captain Mark James had gotten promoted, and was now in control of the Rebel 7th "Locust" fleet. Mark, 39, 6" 4' tall and born and raised on Palshife, was very intelligent and strong. Married, he lived on Palshife, and helped his friend Judah Hassid create the laser bolt gun, a terrifying weapon that was like a laser machine gun. Judah Hassid had been an old friend of Mark's, and he also controlled his own fleet.
Lewis handed Mark a small bag. "Whoa!" said Mark as he pulled a large proton gun from the bag.
"That's a Viper .38 advanced level proton gun. That thing can fire a lot faster than normal proton guns, and has a killing range of 350 feet. Once there was a guy who had some tritainium armor on, got shot at by one of these, he was dead before he hit the ground. It can also smash through heavy durasteel doors."
"Oh my..."
"Yeah. I have a similar one of those myself. So, with this new promotion, what do you command?"
"I command 13 cruisers, 39 destroyers, and 41 squadrons of Mantas, all of which belong to the 7th Rebel "Locust" fleet. I also control another 8 cruisers, 40 destroyers, and 20 squadrons of Mantas," replied Mark.
"Wow. Man, you have a lot of power."
"Well, I actually don't really want lots of power. I'd rather blow up a few Confed ships."
"Hey, just don't forget that you're really good at engineering, Mark."
"That's the way God made me." The door suddenly opened and a lieutenant poked her head in.
"Captain James, Captain Steele, the captains of the Panther and Leopard fleets are here," the lieutenant said.
"Great. Come on Lewis, lets go," Mark said.
"Who are the Panther and Leopard fleets?"
"You don't know? Those fleets captured the Polaris and Capella systems. They're actually a bit famous."
"Oh yeah, those fleets."
Mark and Lewis walked out of the room, through a hallway, and into another, larger, briefing room. In the room stood two captains.
Mark walked up to a man about 6 feet tall and 41 years of age. "Hello, Judah Hassid. Congratulations on your victory in the Polaris system. And who is this, my friend?" asked Mark.
"This is Daniel Ramer," replied Judah Hassid, gesturing towards a another captain. He was an African American, 38, and 6" 1'.
"Hello Captain Ramer. Captain Hassid, you know where I'll be sent next?"
"That's actually what I wanted to talk to you about. Captain Steele, Captain Ramer, may we be excused?"
"Sure," replied Daniel.
As soon as Judah and Mark were alone, Judah explained. "You've heard about the Confederations research on new hyperspace technology?"
"Yes, sir."
"Well, Rebel High Command has told me to give you the assignment of capturing some of that technology."
"Wow."
"Yes, and not only that, but as soon as we have the technology you will use it to explore new systems."
"Double Wow."
"Just remember to be weary of angry aliens once you start exploring. Also, we could use some new friends to help us annihilate the Confeds."
"Okay, when do I get started?"
"Right away. You'll be equipped with 3 modified destroyers, all installed with cloaking devices. You'll have to land on New Britain and take a commando team to a nearby research facility. There you will find the hyperspace technology. Once you have the technology, get out of there VERY quickly."
"Will I have any cover fire?"
"Yes, 6 squadrons of Mantas will keep the Confeds busy in space, and they should provide adequate cover fire. However you'll have to come up with the plan for getting into the research facility."
"Yes sir, I'll get started on that plan right away."
Soon the Rebel fleet was assembled and Mark was ready. The Rebel fleet took off from Turin V and headed straight towards New Britain. They soon passed the Yemuro and Matar systems, and then they entered the Rigel system. "Divert all available power to the cloaking device, and engage auxiliary generators," said Mark, "and then begin careful descent."
The Rebel destroyers slowly started to descend. Mark didn't want much turbulence that the Confeds could detect, so the Rebel ships went down slowly. Mark started to feel the destroyer shake a little, and then he felt like he was being pushed back into his seat. That was because the G-Force Stabilizers were running on low power, and so they didn't stop all the G-Forces.
After about 12 minutes the Rebel destroyers landed, then uncloaked. Mark came out of his Rebel destroyer just as the commando team came out of the other two destroyers. Mark quickly strapped on some personnel armor, and picked up a large proton rifle, then headed towards the facility.
As soon as they reached it, two commandos volunteered to keep watch while the others infiltrated the facility. Mark then pulled out a grappling hook gun and pointed skywards. He fired the mechanism and the hook soared into the air, then fell and caught the side of the research facility. Soon Mark and the other commandos were on top of the first story. Mark motioned towards a small window after looking at his scanner. Now all Mark had to do was get unnoticed into the building and capture some technology.
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At that moment Matthew Derrk was in the lab looking over the days work. Matthew was 39, 6' 3", and lived on New Britain. He had no family, so he spent most of his time working.
Matthew had been ordered to transmit the schematics of the new hyperspace beacon to Luna. He had already done that and was now making sure there were no bugs in the system. All of a sudden, he heard the back door blow open from an explosion. He shot up and reached for his laser gun. The guard in the room turned around and fired a few shots before he was killed by another explosion.
Matthew ducked behind a table as 4 commandos burst into the room. Matthew shot at them with his laser gun, but they ducked before he could kill them. A fifth commando crawled into the room and went over to a computer consul. Matthew tried to stop him but he was pinned down by heavy proton fire. He ducked behind another desk a little ways back. "Intruder alert! Repeat, intruder alert!" Matthew said into his intercom.
2 guards came into the room, brandishing their laser rifles. They killed another enemy commando before they were pinned down by another 3 commandos coming into the room. Matthew got up a little and started firing at the commandos with his laser gun. He knew that he needed to stop that one commando from downloading some of the Confederations top secret hyperspace technology.
Mark lay on the floor, listening to his commandos keep the enemy guards occupied. All of a sudden lasers smashed into the desk he was behind. Mark reached for the Viper, his promotion present from Lewis, and aimed at the source of the lasers. A split second after he had fired, a computer on top of a desk exploded, sending shards of metal and debris everywhere. Mark fired again at another desk, nearly splitting the desk in two.
A series of beeps told him that his downloader was finished. He picked it up and put it in his pocket. Mark fired another 3 shots, sending glass fragments flying, and then raced for the door.
As they were running down the corridor, Mark turned around to see a guard run out of the room and aim at them. Mark raised the Viper and fired. The guard suddenly doubled over, then lay motionless.
Soon Mark was in the bridge of his destroyer that was now racing away from the planet. As soon as they were out of the atmosphere, Mark saw around 18 Mantas. "All Mantas, prepare to hyperspace out of the system," said Mark.
As Mark's fleet was about to go into hyperspace, 5 Confed frigates hyperspaced into the system, blocking Mark's path. Mark thought for a moment before saying into the comlink, "All ships, group together and then go full throttle forward."
Mark hoped the sight of all his ships racing forward would make the captains of the frigates move out of the way, and in doing that allowing Mark's fleet to go into hyperspace. The plan worked, the frigates moved out of the way, and Mark quickly hyperspaced out.
Matthew Derrk surveyed the damage done to the lab. Glass fragments from test tubes and other glasses lay splattered all over the place. Chemicals had been spilled everywhere, several computers had been pulverized, and some other highly expensive equipment had been destroyed. But the worst thing of all was that one of those commandos had downloaded an enormous amount of data on the Confederation's hyperspace technology.
"Here's the casualty report," said an ensign. "3 guards dead, 1 guard wounded, and damage cost adds up to 3 million credits."
"Thank you ensign, does headquarters know what happened?"
"No sir, nobody's had the guts to tell them. If you want me to send them a message..."
"No thank you, I'll do that."
Mark James sat in a large briefing room. Admiral Christopher Davies sat across from him talking on a phone with some other high ranking official. Davies, a dark brown haired man in his early forties, was the top admiral for the entire Rebel fleet. He had gotten this rank for helping the Rebellion destroy the last remaining Alien cruiser two months ago, along with the help of a mercenary pilot.
"Okay, yes sir," said Admiral Davies. He put the phone down and then turned towards Mark. "Rebel High Command wants us to go right ahead with using the newly constructed hyperspace beacon. You will go to Liberty Station, where the hyperspace beacon now resides. From there you will attempt to find and explore new systems. Also try to make friends with every alien race you find."
"Yes, Admiral. Are there any specific instructions?"
"No, only we would like to warn you to watch out for the Confeds. Our informants tell us that they are amassing a large task force in the NGC-4561 system. It appears they are also going to explore some new systems."
Matthew Derrk sat in the bridge chair of the U.S.S. Mars, Matthew's Confed Cruiser. He had told Confederation High Command about what happened, and they were not pleased. He had then been ordered to take a fleet of ships to explore new systems, before the Rebels did. However Matthew knew the Rebels had probably already begun.
"Captain, we are ready to disembark."
"Thank you ensign. Engineering, activate the hyperspace beacon. Helm, prepare to go into hyperspace."
On the viewscreeen appeared a map of the surrounding systems. The system that Matthew was in, NGC-4561, started blinking; that meant the hyperspace beacon was searching for new systems. Suddenly the blinking stopped, and several new systems appeared. Matthew set a course for the NSX-0003 system.
"Going into hyperspace," said an ensign. "In 5, 4, 3, 2, 1,....."
Matthew felt his chair shaking just a bit then, Zooooom! The fleet went into hyperspace in the blink of an eye. Matthew felt the shaking subside, then he got up and started going towards his quarters. He thought they were now safe, the Rebels would not be a threat. And he was right, the Rebels were not a threat. Someone else was.
Chapter 2: Retaliate
Boom! The U.S.S. Mars, Matthew's Confed cruiser, jumped into the NSX-0013 system along with numerous other ships. NSX-0013 was the ninth system Matthew Derrk had explored, and so far they had found no sign of life.
"Anything in this system?" Matthew asked.
"Moderate asteroid field, 1 class E star at the edge of the system, and absolutely no life."
"Thank you lieutenant. Helm, prepare to go into hyper-"
BANG! The Mars rocked violently from an explosion. BANG! BANG! BOOM! A Confed frigate to the right of the Mars shuddered as 2 explosions blew apart it's left pylon.
"Where did those explosions come from?"
"19 ships closing in at 4 o'clock!"
The view screen suddenly showed 19 ships closing awfully fast. Thirteen of them were Rapiers, Lightnings, Kestrels, Corvettes, and other civilian ships; the other 6 were totally new. Some of them looked like modified Kestrels, others looked like Clippers or Corvettes.
"Open fire!" yelled Matthew, just as another frigate blew up from several torpedo hits.
The entire Confed fleet turned around and started heading towards the enemy fleet, during which firing of torpedoes and missiles. The enemy fleet responded by increasing speed and weapons fire. Several large missiles smashed into a Confed frigate, causing it to burst into flames. Two Rapiers started heading towards the Mars at full speed. The Mars opened up with it's proton turrets. Suddenly the Rapiers were no more than ash.
"Helm, look out for that unknown corvette!" said Matthew.
The Mars pulled hard to the left, just as the disabled unknown corvette drifted by. Suddenly a Kestrel came up alongside and started beating up the Mars. The Mars returned fire with missiles and proton turrets. After a minute the Kestrel was pulverized.
At the same time Bravo 1 and 2 (two Confed patrol ships) were pursuing a Lightning around large and small asteroids. The enemy Lightning pulled up, but it's gunboat pursuers didn't loose track of it.
"Yankee 3, can you help us?" asked the pilot of Bravo 1.
"Sorry Bravo 1, I'm a little busy with a Rapier here."
The Bravo 1 pilot suddenly saw the Lightning make a hard right. He jammed his joystick to the right, but then he saw a small asteroid coming towards him. Bravo 1 evaded the asteroid quickly, but then the asteroid smashed into Bravo 2. Bravo 1 continued to chase the enemy lightning. All of a sudden, a Rapier came screaming at Bravo 1. It fired a rocket, and then Bravo 1 exploded.
After a few minutes, the Confed fleet was about to be crushed. The U.S.S. Mars was shooting it out with a Kestrel, when suddenly another damaged Kestrel started coming head on.
"Fire torpedoes!" ordered Matthew. Six torpedoes streamed from the Mars, then they collided with the enemy Kestrel. They hit just behind the bridge section, causing it to split away from the main section. The severed sections floated for a moment, then burst into flames.
During that time the Mars had still been fighting the other Kestrel with it's proton turrets, and by that time the enemy Kestrel was about to explod. After a few more blasts from some proton turrets, the Kestrel exploded.
Suddenly the Kestrel's engine section and a part of one of the pylons flung out of the explosion and then smashed into the Mars. Matthew and the entire crew were thrown to their feet. Matthew hit his head on a bulkhead, then everything went black.
A few hours later, Daniel Ramer sat in a control tower overlooking New Atlanta spaceport on Capella. Daniel Ramer and his 9th Panther had been ordered here because of numerous Confed attacks.
"Sir, incoming fleet," suddenly reported the sensor officer.
"How many ships?" asked Daniel.
"Twenty-One."
"Government?"
"Uh, I'm not sure sir. Their transponders say Retaliators."
"Who are they?"
"I have no idea. SIR! They're firing weapons!"
Upon hearing that, Daniel ordered the view screen on. It turned on to show a large group of Kestrels and Corvettes, but very few fighters. There were also 3 new classes of ships.
"Identify those new ships," ordered Daniel.
"The Kestrel look-alike's transponder identifies it as a Vulture. The corvette look-alike says its a Cobra. And that ship that looks like a clipper is a Challenger."
"Send out a distress signal to any available Rebel ships, and also prepare to fire planetary defenses in case they get to close. I'll be on my ship."
With that Daniel quickly left the control tower and headed towards his ship, the R.S.S. Magellan. The control tower and spaceport was now under the control of Captain Jim Gatman.
As soon as Daniel's cruiser got into space, 2 corvettes and a Challenger came screaming down on him. With 4 heavy rockets and a missile, the Challenger was reduced to space debris. The corvettes zoomed over the Magellan while shooting missiles and laser turrets. As they started heading away, the Magellan turned and fired a heavy rocket at the enemy corvettes. The rocket smashed into the corvette's engine, making it burst into flames.
Suddenly the corvettes turned around started heading towards the Magellan again. Daniel fired 3 heavy rockets at the first corvette with the good engine. The third rocket crashed into the bridge, setting the entire front section aflame. The corvette drifted for about 10 seconds before a squadron of Mantas swooped in and finished it off with laser fire. The second corvette kept on coming, though it's engine was badly damaged. The Magellan finally destroyed that with heavy proton turret fire.
So far the battle was going evenly, neither side winning. But that all changed when the only other cruiser besides Daniel's cruiser was destroyed. Daniel's only hope now was that more Rebel reinforcements would come to his aid before the Retaliators, whoever they were, overran him.
At that moment Mark was still looking for inhabited systems. He had just hyperspaced into the Xalor system when his sensor officer picked up something.
"Sir! New sensor contacts. Directly behind us! About 27 of them!"
"Are they enemies?" asked Mark. Suddenly the Sovereign, Mark's cruiser, shook from hundreds of laser and proton hits. Several Mantas and destroyers exploded. The Rebel fleet turned to face it's attackers. They opened up with a equally powerful barrage of weapons fire. Suddenly 4 more enemy ships hyperspaced into the system.
Suddenly Mark's sensor officer intercepted a message sent by a Rebel destroyer to another cruiser. It read "Go immediately to Capella system. Enemy force, known now as the retaliators, has attacked the base. Captain Daniel Ramer is holding them off for now. Need immediate assistance."
After about another 13 minutes, Mark's fleet seemed doomed. They could not destroy enough Retaliator ships quick enough. They now only had 13 ships out of the 21 original ships.
"Sir, another 17 sensor contacts, however they're not retaliator."
"They're not?"
"No. Sir, they are closing in!"
Mark looked at the view screen, and saw a large fleet of unknown ships. There were only 2 types, one type looked kind of like a smooth rectangle larger than a gunboat with the top of the front sloping downwards. In the front there were also 2 gun barrels. The second type looked like the first except it was a little smaller than a Confed frigate, and it had a larger engine section.
The unknown fleet swarmed the Retaliator fleet. Mark watched as both types of ships started firing some form of fast firing disintegrator cannon. The weapon easily tore ships to pieces. Fighters hit by the cannon instantly disintegrated. After a minute or so, the Retaliator fleet had been completely destroyed.
"Sir, we are receiving a message from the new fleet."
"Put it on the view screen," ordered Mark.
The view screen switched views from the battle to show an alien, much like a human. The alien had an elongated head, with red stripes going from the front of the head to the back of the head, the rest of it was colored gray, black and dark red. It had long, all black eyes, that were just a tad smaller than human eyes. It's arms, body, and legs were quite muscular. It had large menacing jaws, and the entire alien was about 6' 6" tall.
"We are the from the Rogue Order. I was marauding this area of space when I saw you. First, who are you and what are you doing here?" asked the Rogue.
"I am Mark C. James from the Rebellion," Mark replied.
"Rebellion?" asked the Rogue.
"Long story. Anyway, we were exploring these systems when we were attacked by the Retaliators."
"Okay, hey lets make a deal. We will gratefully protect you if you help us with a problem," said the alien.
"It depends on the problem," replied Mark.
"I will tell you when we get to Ra Lamehh. That's the nearest big spaceport."
"Okay, Captain...."
"Admiral Cramge."
"Okay Admiral Cramge, we'll go with you immediately. Also, when we get to Ra Lamehh, can we use your comm system to send a message back home?"
"Absolutely, Captain."
Douglas Brown sat in the cockpit of an Anaconda Freighter/Light Cruiser. The Anaconda's front section looked like the front section on a corvette, but the back section looked like the back section of an Argosy. The entire ship was colored dark gray and dark blue.
Douglas Brown was a retired iron ore miner and ore shipper from the Zechac system*. Douglas worked as a miner mining iron ore for 19 years. He had then worked as a shipper transporting iron ore to whoever wanted it. He was now retired and just worked for fun every once and a while.
He was now bringing a shipment of food to New Columbia in the Tau Ceti system. He was in the Antares system when suddenly 20 Retaliator vessels hyperspaced into the system, however Douglas didn't know who the Retaliators were yet.
"Who are they?" asked Jerry Matten, Douglas' co-pilot.
"I have no idea," replied Douglas.
Suddenly the Retaliator fleet opened fire on some Confed frigates in the area. The Confed frigates were able to send one message out of the system before the Retaliator fleet jammed the transmission. Soon another Confed cruiser hyperspaced into the system.
"Oh my. Do you think they're Pirates?" asked Jerry.
"I've never seen a Pirate fleet that big. And those new ships are Pirate. In fact I've never seen them before."
"Lets see. I've finally got a reading on their transponders. That's weird, their transponders say they're Retaliator, who are they?"
"I'm not sure. Uh oh!"
Douglas turned to see the Retaliator fleet now busy with Antares Station, and in the distance Douglas could see wreckage from the Confed ships. The defense fleet had been crushed, and the station defenses had been obliterated. A second or two later, Antares Station exploded.
"Oh great! Jerry, lets get going!"
CRACK! SMASH! BANG! ZING! Hundreds of laser bolts smashed into the Magellan's hull. The crippled cruiser was returning fire with it's proton turrets, but they could not do enough damage to the enemy Cobra, a custom Retaliator corvette. Daniel Ramer, captain of the Magellan, was about to call the order to abandon ship when suddenly the enemy Cobra exploded. Several other Cobras exploded in random succession. Five enemy fighters coming at the Magellan were engulfed in laser fire.
"How'd that happen?" asked Daniel, obviously bewildered.
"I think I know why. I'm detecting 24 new Rebel vessels. I didn't see them before because sensors were off line. I've identified them as the 13th Goliath fleet."
"That's Lewis Steele's fleet," said Daniel.
Suddenly the view screen switched views to show Lewis.
"Hi Captain Ramer. How are ya doing?"
"Uh, fine sir. Thank you for saving my fleet, or what's left of it."
"Don't mention it. Quick, I've gotten a message from headquarters, they say these Retaliators are going to make a public statement."
Mark sat with Admiral Cramge and some of his officers. A few Rogue were also in the room, looking intently at the holo-vid. On the screen appeared the Retaliator leader.
"The Retaliator leader is speaking from an unknown location," said the news spokesman.
"I come with a message," began the Retaliator president. "We will not allow any Confed or Rebel ships into the new systems they have discovered! Our attacks on Confed and Rebel installations were a demonstration of what we will do to protect these new systems, and as a warning of what is to come! If you go exploring any farther, all of humanity will be destroyed! And remember, the Retaliators will do whatever is necessary to stop you!"
The screen switched back to the news spokesman. A Rogue then leaned forward and turned it off. At that moment Cramge laughed a little. "Huh! Those Retaliators are so dense! Mark, they're nuts! They say there is going to be a global catastrophe if the Rebels and Confeds explore new systems. But what they didn't say also matters. They also don't want anyone in those new systems because they want the planets in them. They want all those planets and the resources on them."
"How do you know that anyway?" asked Mark.
"One of our spies learned about it a week ago. Unfortunately he was discovered and barely escaped with his life using a stolen Vulture, a Retaliator Kestrel," replied Cramge.
"So what's this problem you have?"
"Lets start at the beginning," the Rogue admiral continued. "We, the Rogue, used to live far away from this part of space. Until one day when the Metalites attacked us and completely overwhelmed our space navy.
"The Metalites were a group of marauding robots, they went from solar system to solar system destroying everything in their path.
"They forced us to retreat to this location, but they came after us. However, they did not anticipate the amount of resistance they encountered. They were eventually forced back. But revenge got the best of us, and so we followed them. We destroyed Metalite outpost after outpost, soon they clung only to their home planet. We made a massive assault, and soon their planet was ours. Only a few of them escaped, and so, happy with our victory, we started going home.
"And now we are here, fighting each other constantly. Three weeks ago we were all enemies, but we didn't attack each other much. But two weeks ago the Vorg Empire, another alien, discovered a new system. The system name was Argus, and there were 16 planets and 13 moons in it. However, in the orbit of a planet name Artrust, and it's moon Atrust, there were unusual sub-space distortions. When one of the ships went in the distortions, it was ripped apart instantly.
"The Vorg fleet discovered, through sensor scans, that on Artrust, Atrust, and the planets and moons in the system, there were vast amounts of resources.
"Immediately every alien, including the Rogue, started to attack each other, but most of the conflict occurred in the Argus system. However, not one alien was able to make a decisive victory. And at this moment our forces are engaging enemy vessels in the Argus system. And at the same time thousands of our troops are fighting on the system's many planets.
"And so now I am asking you to help us capture that system, and solve the mystery on how to get on Artrust."
"I'll have to ask my superiors..."
"What about signing an alliance? And in doing so, we will also help you attack the Confeds."
Lewis sat at a large table. To his left was Daniel Ramer, to his right was Judah Hassid. Near the head of the table, sitting next to Admiral Cramge, was Mark James. At the head of the table sat the Rogue's president. To his right sat Fleet Admiral Karacu Hattruk, and to his right sat Admiral Davies.
A small pad was passed first to Mark James, who signed his name, then to Admiral Cramge. The pad, after being signed by Admiral Davies and Fleet Admiral Hattruk, is signed by the president of the Rogue.
"The Rebellion and the Rogue Order are proclaimed allies!" All the Rogue in the room cheered. So does most of the Rebel officers.
After the signing of the alliance, Lewis went into the reception hall. On the buffet table there were many Rogue delicacies. However Lewis only liked the Rogue fruit, a kind of meat, and some Rogue jello-like substance.
"Hello Lewis. How are you doing?" said Mark.
"Fine Mark. Hey, do you like that jello stuff?" replied Lewis.
"Yeah, I also like the Rogue fish."
"I didn't get to that."
"I heard you saved Daniel a few days ago."
"Eh, nothing to it."
"Hello Captains. How do you like our food?" asked Admiral Cramge.
"Good. I really like your fruit," replied Lewis.
"Very good. Now I need to talk to you. I've told you the story about what's happening here but I haven't told you about the aliens."
Admiral Cramge lead Lewis and Mark to another smaller room, much like the one they had been in for the signing except not as big. Admiral Cramge pushed a button on the table and a picture appeared on a screen near the head of the table. It showed an alien much like the Rogue except it had smaller jaws, was colored green and black, and had a wider head, and it's eyes were a bit larger.
"This alien is a Vorg, their government is called the Vorg Empire. They have the largest space, and are probably the strongest. They have big, bulky ships, and their fighters are totally obsolete. The ship you want to worry about is the Vorg Battleship."
The screen suddenly showed another alien, this time it was all black, except for some spots of purple, and instead of hands, it had huge deadly blades. Coming out from the upper back were 4 tentacles. Its head was a bit longer than the Rogues, and its eyes were thinner and longer. It also had a black cloak.
"This is a Vorna. The most ferocious of the aliens in this space, they are the third strongest, we are also the third strongest. The Vorna also have disrupter weapons, which are very dangerous. Their ships aren't that big, except for the Vorna dreadnought. All the other ships are medium sized, and very maneuverable."
The screen now showed a robot. It was all black, except for gold colored stripes in certain places. It had a head that was shorter than a humans, and instead of eyes there was a thin red line. It had a thick neck, and it's hands were pincers.
"These robots are known as the Kitex. They were once organic life forms just like us, but they turned themselves into robots. However they still have a normal brain, which is implanted with numerous implants. And they also have a nervous system, but they don't feel pain. Those pincers can crush metal, and they also have another version that has human like hands. Even though they still use a normal brain, they are still much smarter than any alien here. They are probably the second strongest."
The screen switched to show a cloaked alien. Lewis could make out menacing red eyes, and super sharp jaws and teeth. And finally it was colored black and purple, but it's robe was just all black.
"These are The Thinkers. They are a group of aliens who mainly just sit around and meditate. They are very smart, second only to the Kitex. They don't have very good weapons or ships, but they do make swarms of ships. And when you have swarms of ships, it really doesn't matter how bad your ship is."
The screen finally switched to show what looked kind of like a human. Instead of hands, it had large pincers like that of a crab or lobster. It also had very large jaws, and 4 tentacles. It was colored completely gray and dark green, and also had very long black and green eyes. Finally it was quite slimy.
"And this is a Crasluug. There are kind of like a mix between a slug and a crab. We usually don't come into conflict with them, but when we do, it can get pretty tense. They never ever just send one ship. When they send ships, they send lots and lots of ships."
"So," said Lewis, "we will have to fight these aliens! I just hope I get to stay in space. I really don't like thinking about fighting those guys on a battlefield!"
"Don't worry Captain Steele. The hardest part will be getting past the sub-space distortions."
*The Zechac system was previously NGC-8457, and the planet Zechac I was previously P-8457.
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I wrote this story a looooong time ago. However, I kind of lost interest and forgot about it. Now I'm just going to post everything I've written and finish up the last few incomplete chapters. Please excuse any horrendous spelling/grammar errors, seeing as how I don't have very much time to edit it very much.
(This message has been edited by moderator (edited 03-24-2003).)
whimper Something must have happened when you submitted the story, Carno, as ALL of the quotation marks and apostrophes got converted into question marks. That means I got to go through every single line to get them all. Grrr.
As a result, I don't feel like it would be fair to the story if I were to give my opinion. However, I can say honestly and truthfully that there is a fine line between providing a good amount of details and providing too many; giving the exact age and height of everyone, as well as explaining about their personal lives, falls into the second category. Sorry, but I'm not one of the kinds of people that likes having every detail specified in a story, since it seems to just drag down the action of the story.
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True, EVula, but it's nice to know what everyone looks like. One thing that bugged me, you said that the one captain was African American. Was he born on Earth, in America? Or is he just dark skinned?
Anyway, I like it. You had some good ideas in there.
-Rawzer
------------------ Social correctness has traditionally had nothing whatever to do with reason, logic, or physics. -Douglas Adams, Salmon of Doubt The Aftermath will soon be upon you. Be warned.
It was a decent story line, but this is another story that could use some deep meaning, emotion, theme, and some mood. It also played out more like a documentary than an actual fiction story. Other than that it was okay.
------------------ Man have pity on man
Quote
Originally posted by Rawzer: True, EVula, but it's nice to know what everyone looks like.
Providing details about physical characteristics is one thing, but providing those details in a very dry manner every single time is boring. It also isn't necessary for every single person; if you describe the height of Person A, you can use relative terms for another person talking to Person B, or whatever. I just don't care to have every detail handed to me in such a blantant "here is the information" format.
I agree. Which is why I said "true."
Good story kind to descriptive but what I liked about it was the fact that it wasn't that predictable (Other than the descriptions). I particularily like the sentance"implanted with numerous implants"
------------------ The assasins the one that holds the gun but homeworks the one that kills you.
Originally posted by Jas86: **It was a decent story line, but this is another story that could use some deep meaning, emotion, theme, and some mood.
**
I very much agree with Jas86. Spend a little more time fleshing out the stuff in the story and it will take on a life of its own. One thing I would have liked was a bit more intro to the characters who would be important to the story. Maybe a bit of background or something about their personality that will grab attention. As for mood, put yourself in the position of your characters and think how they might feel if faced with strange and new aliens.
I just like to niggle over the little things. You really don't have to listen to me at all. This story has a lot of promise with a little more polish. For me, I don't let a story go unless I have proofed it 4 to 5 times.
Anyways...Keep up the good work!
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EVula; oh dear. Hmmmmm... I will definitely have to figure out a way to fix that. Sorry for the trouble.
As for the descriptions; yes, I suppose there was too many, but you must note that I wrote this ages ago.
As for the black guy; if I remember it correctly, I mainly just wanted to give the impression that he was black. Perhaps I thought, at the time, that "Black" was the wrong word to use or something.
Though, um, I've already written a great deal of it, so it will be rather hard to polish up as more parts come out.
------------------ If at first you don't succeed...Hit it harder! - Me -------------- Millennium. Its coming, prepare for it. Coming to the (url="http://"http://www.ambrosiaSW.com/games/ev/chronicles.html")EV Chronicles(/url).
(This message has been edited by Captain Carnotaur (edited 04-02-2003).)