The Albatross

A scared-looking newbie wanders in the door, says "It's from Calvin and Hobbes," and wanders back out again before anything can happen to him.

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SNM trips over Borb on his way out.
Borb grabs his gun as he gets up, then seeing that it's SNM, he says.
"Yo man, what's up? Hey, look you want to help me with these boxes of toilet paper?"

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A life, ohhhh, that a new plug-in right?
"Borb II of V.S.S Hellfire."

(This message has been edited by Borb II (edited 01-20-2003).)

Luke walks in. Luke shouts, "This is a blatant rip-off of the Boozerama! It's cheesey and unoriginal and I like it!" Luke orders some fried albatross.

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Write your complaints here: O
Please don't write out of the space.
(url="http://"http://www.evula.com")-(/url)-(url="http://"http://www.zombo.com")-(/url)-(url="http://"http://albinoblacksheep.com/flash/demented.html")-(/url)-(url="http://"http://www.homestead.com/lukenj/index.html")-(/url)-----------

With the entrance of other-boarders, D takes a moment off from eternity to join an intergalactic circus. "One day I shall return, my loyal patrons. And when I do, I shall ruthlessly slay any and all who have trashed my newly-polished oak bar." With that, D packs up his bags, stuffs the remaining bits of William Shatner into his pocket, and steps onto the bridge of his old Cruiser, headed for parts unknown.

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"Never give yourself a haircut after three margaritas."

Shek chuckled at the sight of the threatening heads. Moving his hands to form arcane sigils in the air, the offending heads were teleported to the nearest event horizon of a black hole. He then moved to perform the Ceremony of Revival on any of the remaining patrons who fell to their deaths among the carnage unleased by the heads, investing them with life once again. He then moved back to his seat and slept.

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All that is gold does not glitter, Not all those who wander are lost; The old that is strong does not wither, Deep roots are not reached by the frost. From the ashes a fire shall be woken, A light from the shadows shall spring; Renewed shall be blade that was broken, The crownless again shall be king.
—J. R. R. Tolkien
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Quote

Originally posted by Desperado:
**With the entrance of other-boarders, D takes a moment off from eternity to join an intergalactic circus. "One day I shall return, my loyal patrons. And when I do, I shall ruthlessly slay any and all who have trashed my newly-polished oak bar." With that, D packs up his bags, stuffs the remaining bits of William Shatner into his pocket, and steps onto the bridge of his old Cruiser, headed for parts unknown.

**

pp realizes the bar now has no ruler. Although pp no longer wants the job, frightened, pp takes barkeeping duties for while D is away. He looks up to see Luke and smiles. "Oh boy! Luke's here!..... Why did I just say Oh Boy?" pp tosses Luke a free Dr. Pepper (Remember kids, they're free) before sleeping to meet his doom. (Actually, pp is just sleeping, but isn't that a fun word? Doom! Just say it! Add a dark, evil voice to it, and you've got... Doom with a dark evil voice to it! Hurrah!)

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"I love deadlines, I love the 'whooshing' sound they make as they go by." - Douglas Adams.

Luke sips his DP as he waits for his fried albatross.

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Write your complaints here: O
Please don't write out of the space.
(url="http://"http://www.evula.com")-(/url)-(url="http://"http://www.zombo.com")-(/url)-(url="http://"http://albinoblacksheep.com/flash/demented.html")-(/url)-(url="http://"http://www.homestead.com/lukenj/index.html")-(/url)-----------

pp wonders what the heck fried Albatross is... Ah well, pp finds some "Microwavable Frozen Albatross" in back, microwaves it, and slides it over to Luke.

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"I love deadlines, I love the 'whooshing' sound they make as they go by." - Douglas Adams.

Breaking his own rule, (I'm special) pp double-posts and waits for somebody to do something in the bar. C'mon people! It's been almost a week!

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"I love deadlines, I love the 'whooshing' sound they make as they go by." - Douglas Adams.

Roamer orders twenty toilet paper casserolls and heads for the Billiard Table.

"How about a game D?"

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Rebels=fast Confed=suck Traders=cool BountyHunters=little bros chasin you, bitin you.

Quote

Originally posted by Nebula Roamer:
**Roamer orders twenty toilet paper casserolls and heads for the Billiard Table.

"How about a game D?"

**

The scared-looking newbie wanders back in in the hopes that someone will kill him in an interesting fashion or do something else worth reading about.

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D crashes his cruiser into the bar, decimating half of whatever stellar body it's on to begin with. he narrowly escapes the destruction in his brand new clown car. murderous rampages are good. D stops the car, and a legion of killer death clowns steps out. their ranks are seemingly endless. smiling all the way, they proceed to stuff SNMs various bodily cavities with baloon-animals, and then throw a rabid, HIV positive monkey on him to finish the job. "nice, work men," D beams proudly. the clowns all sit down to watch the nooB die a slow, horrible, AIDS-infested death.

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"Never give yourself a haircut after three margaritas."

Quote

Originally posted by Desperado:
**D crashes his cruiser into the bar, decimating half of whatever stellar body it's on to begin with. he narrowly escapes the destruction in his brand new clown car. murderous rampages are good. D stops the car, and a legion of killer death clowns steps out. their ranks are seemingly endless. smiling all the way, they proceed to stuff SNMs various bodily cavities with baloon-animals, and then throw a rabid, HIV positive monkey on him to finish the job. "nice, work men," D beams proudly. the clowns all sit down to watch the nooB die a slow, horrible, AIDS-infested death.

**

pp looks up smiles. "Nice to see you back D."
He joins the show as the Monkey discovers how to create mass static electricity with his body and a baloon. Zap...heheh...zap...

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"I love deadlines, I love the 'whooshing' sound they make as they go by." - Douglas Adams.

Shek Sunrunner, after long contemplation, decides he has had enough booze. Drawing his falchion and saying farewell to everyone in the bar, he slices his head off. It and his body then disintegrate into puffs of blue smoke and fly out the door.

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It's been fun y'all!

Regards,
Solel

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All that is gold does not glitter, Not all those who wander are lost; The old that is strong does not wither, Deep roots are not reached by the frost. From the ashes a fire shall be woken, A light from the shadows shall spring; Renewed shall be blade that was broken, The crownless again shall be king.
—J. R. R. Tolkien
(url="http://"http://www.ambrosiasw.com/cgi-bin/ubb/search.cgi?action=intro&default;=26")The Search Feature(/url)

Quote

Originally posted by Desperado:
**D crashes his cruiser into the bar, decimating half of whatever stellar body it's on to begin with. he narrowly escapes the destruction in his brand new clown car. murderous rampages are good. D stops the car, and a legion of killer death clowns steps out. their ranks are seemingly endless. smiling all the way, they proceed to stuff SNMs various bodily cavities with baloon-animals, and then throw a rabid, HIV positive monkey on him to finish the job. "nice, work men," D beams proudly. the clowns all sit down to watch the nooB die a slow, horrible, AIDS-infested death.

**

Well, that's certainly gruesome, but actually not that interesting. Good try, though.
The newbie grows back together again

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D rips out SNMs intestines, leaving him alive and in extreme pain. He wraps the intestines around the poor being's foot and hangs him up over the acid pit. D never was a boyscout though, and the knot that holds SNM from an acidy death is slowly slipping. You want interesting? We're playing interactive death, where you get to choose wether you save yourself or build the suspense. Would someone ELSE kill him please? Obviously I'M not good enough. Oh yeah, no booze for you! ...grumble grumble dont like my AIDS monkey grumble...

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"Never give yourself a haircut after three margaritas."

Quote

Originally posted by Desperado:
**Would someone ELSE kill him please?
**

Your faitful servant (Don't get any ideas from the word servant, I was kidding) pp here! Kill 'im? Gladly sir. The light catches pp's teeth as he grins (Do penguins have teeth?) at SNM. "So, how shall I do this SNM? Ohohohohohohohohohohohohohohoho! Idea! How 'bout I-" Too late. SNM drops into the pit before pp can do anything. "Yeah, that works too," pp mutters.

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"I love deadlines, I love the 'whooshing' sound they make as they go by." - Douglas Adams.

Eccchhhhh!!!!!!!!
Save me!
I have another 2 hours to flail wildly before I die!!!!

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Beating Roamer single handledly in pool without so much as a word, D decides to go check on SNM. "Flailing in the acid pit, are we?" D picks up the cue ball and sends it streaking at SNM, knocking him unconcious and leaving him unable to fight his way back to the surface of the acid. SNM regenerates. "What's the point?" D asks rhetoricaly. "I can't even spell the word." D makes a club sandwich with SNM, Roamer, and pp, closing the deal with a pool-stick through their heads. "NOW you can flail for hours. Jerks." D slinks off to brood about brooding.

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"Never give yourself a haircut after three margaritas."