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Okay, this is a new TaS, a chance for some new people to hop onto the wagon so to speak. No guarrantees on how long this will last but I'll try. The story starts like this:
Deep inside the nebulae, Captain Jim docks his brand new destroyer with an alien ship and walks inside to talk with the commander...
------------------ I trust you Ubbie baby-Pam Damn it Pam, stop glowing-Harry You know Harry, I used to like you-Ubermann
Translated from German, Ubermannen means 'to overpower' Translated from German, Ubermensch means 'superman' 'Nuff said
Gene pools need their own lifeguards.
He is instantly caught by the gaurds wating at the airlock. They take him to the captein. When he sees the captin he is over come by horrer. It is...
Who is the captin? Why was jim dumb enough to go inside insted of sending an offecir? Why can't I spell?
Findout the answers to most of these questions on... TAS 2 1/2!
------------------ I guss Hucked on Fonex werked fer you tew.
mispelt. Not only that, it is misspelt. In a whirl of illiteracy, Captan Jam beseeched spotty to boom him up. At that precise moment
------------------
...something big and explosive hits the alien ship. Its a heavy rocket from a fighter. The aliens run off to see what has happened. Meanwhile, Jim escapes back to his own ship. From there, he sees the brave little fighter take on the alien ship. The Fighter is destroyed, but not before the Alien Ship flees the system.
As Capitan Jim watches, the fighter pilot ejects. Jim picks it up.
It turns out the fighter pilot was Jim's old freind from microbiology school, Nash-Burn.
"I saved your ass, Jim." he says.
"I know," replied Jim. "Thanks a lot."
"Wait, Jim. I did it for a reason," Nash-Burn replied, "I need you to do something for me..."
------------------ I bought a Venus Fly Trap today. I was going to name it 'Republican', but the fly trap is beneficial to the enviroment. I'll save that name - someday I might find a plant that eats poor people and minorities. AIM-OctoberFost Yahoo Messenger-OctoberFost http://www.OctoberDevelopment.com
"You know that alien ship you saw, the size of a small moon?" says the pilot, "Destroy it for me and everyone you hold dear and not so dear. It's a threat to life in the universe as we know it. Its evil captain plans to set thermonuclear time bombs in the core of every planet in the galaxy. He wanted your map information so he could find everything more quickly. You have to stop him!"
Jim is taken aback. Then he says...
------------------ I can't think of anything to write here.
After seeing the small and pitiful human eject, the captain of the alien ship orders a course to be set to a small system called Sol. When he gets there, he uses a large and unusual drill mounted on the front of his ship and burrows through antarctica into the centre of the earth! There he has tea along with the mole men while planning his next move and planting a large, thermonuclear device in the planets core.
Will this devious plan succed? Will Captain Jim defeat the aliens? How the heck can a nuke survive the center of the earth?
Find out on the next TaS 2 1/2!
(This message has been edited by Ubermann (edited 09-21-2000).)
After a short briefing from Nash-Burn, Jim goes to New Uzbekistan in the Gussap system. There, he is told, he can find help.
Jim gets there, but is lost amoung the crowds. In a bar, he meets a local tour guide named Earl. Earl agrees to help him against the aliens.
Meanwhile, the mole men look after the nuke, giving it warm rubs every 5 minutes.
Far under a sea of green, Ubermann, the great tactician is planning an invention of magnificent porportions. When it is completed, his brand new Time-Warper-Thingy will be able to send people into the future. He tests it by sending a penny into the future. Seven seconds later, it appears. It didn't dissapear, it only was sent 7 seconds into the future. However, no one knows what could happen if some one used the TWT to go into the past. Either way, Ubermann feels adventurous so he tries sending his pet kelp 50 years into the future.
What will the TWT be used for? What will happen to Ubermann? Why does he have a pet kelp?
You may find these out next time on TaS 2 1/2!
On Beta Hydri XI, the first of the alien's thermonuclear weapons explode. The planet is destroyed...
Back on New Uzbekistan, Jim and Earl upgrade their ships to prepare for battle with the aliens. However, they run low on money...
The Kelp arrives in the future. Strangely, the time travel made it extremly intelligent. It looks arround. It sees something VERY disturbing. It panics and sends itself back to Umbermann's place...
But the radiation has affected it in a way no one ever thought possible. The kelp fails to transport back to Ubermann's place and instead becomes Super-Kelp, Defender Against Thermonuclear Explosive Destruction! Jim and Earl see him and take him along to destroy the evil aliens, and meanwhile, the device in the center of the Earth is being kept warm and toasty by the aliens, as if they are preparing for it to hatch...
Jim, Earl, Super-Kelp, and it's pet bowl of petunias scour the galaxy in search of the perfect blanket. This blanket isn't any old blanket. It is the ancient BLANKET OF THE COSMOS, which actually isn't that ancient and was sent back to the past from Wabash, Illinois in 1987. Anyway, after decoding some alien transmissions they figure out that the blanket can stop the destruction of planets by thermonuclear devices. The aliens are looking for it and it's a race against time. Fortunately they have access to Ubermann's TWT and know how to use it...
------------------ "Sir, victory of the bladder over the mind is inevitable"-James T. Farrell
Unkown to Jim, Earl, and the Kelp, they are being stalked by Earl's old Otolaryangologist, Dr. Richard Malcom. He wants the blanket for himself...
------------------ I bought a Venus Fly Trap today. I was going to name it 'Republican', but the fly trap is beneficial to the enviroment. I'll save that name - someday I might find a plant that eats poor people and minorities. AIM-OctoberFost (url="http://"http://www.geocities.com/octoberfost")October Development(/url) (url="http://"http://pages.hotbot.com/games/ambjorn/index.html")A Thousand Worlds(/url) (url="http://"http://members2.boardhost.com/1kwpub")A Thousand Worlds Public Webboard(/url)
When the kelp returns, Ubermann hears the devastating news...in the future, his home planet is a large ball of string! He immediately forms an army of super-intelligent space kelp and sets them into the future to find out what caused it...
------------------ Translated from German, Ubermannen means 'to overpower' Translated from German, Ubermensch means 'superman' 'Nuff said
Why is phonics not spelled the way it sounds?
The army of super space kelp returns and informs Ubermann that the cause of his planet's transformation is the explosion of a thermonuclear device! He and another army of super kelp go after Dr. Malcom to stop him from stealing the blanket in the near future, which causes the destruction of Ubermann's planet in the farther future. The super kelp track down Dr. Malcom, draw their lightsabers, and proceed to...
------------------ Visit my EVO web site (currently under construction) and tell me how it looks! It's at (url="http://"http://www.geocities.com/evosite")http://www.geocities.com/evosite(/url) !
I can't think of anything else to write...
Jim, Earl, and the original Super Kelp are looking for the blanket. Dr. Richard Malcom is following them. And the Super Kelp Army is following Dr. Malcom.
Suddenly, Price Presentable comes! His attempt to destroy the last 3 TaS topic failed, but now he had his wife, Princess Presentable here to help! They quickly attack the main characters. Earl and the original Super Kelp beat Prince Presentable to death and run off. Princess Prenstable was a a few hundred feet away with a sniper rifle, aiming at Jim's head.
Suddenly, Princess Prenstable got kicked in the head by Dr. Richard Malcom.
The Presentable's 4th attempt to destroy a TaS topic had failed, but now Dr. Malcom has a sniper rifle, and the Super Kelp are closing in on him...
------------------ I bought a Venus Fly Trap today. I was going to name it 'Republican', but the fly trap is beneficial to the enviroment. I'll save that name - someday I might find a plant that eats poor people and minorities.
Do not throw snowballs at me. Do not throw them from a tree. Do not throw then at my knee.
AIM-OctoberFost (url="http://"http://www.geocities.com/octoberfost")October Development(/url) (url="http://"http://pages.hotbot.com/games/ambjorn/index.html")A Thousand Worlds(/url) (url="http://"http://members2.boardhost.com/1kwpub")A Thousand Worlds Public Webboard(/url)
Quietly though, deep in space, a man sits in his private quarters. He is the captain of one of the most powerful fleets in the galaxy and his name is Frederick. He has recently lost all but his capital ship though on an assault on the Garlons. He began the ancient chant of the ages. He balanced himself on his head and said these words:
When the all-knowing monkey slides through the fabric of space Frederick's fleet shall destroy the Garlon race
With these words said, Frederick blinked rapidly exactly twenty two and one half times. Outside in space, forty warships appeared. His fleet restored, Frederick proceeded to his ultimate goal.
Luxembourg
------------------ Harry Rules!
With the destruction of Luxembourg completed in roughly four minutes and thirty-three seconds Frederick is at once elated and dissatisfied. His revenge is complete and he has nothing to show for it, but a pile of rubble five miles across. Then he notices something interesting in the rubble. He tells a lieutenant on the bridge to take a dropship and retrieve the object partially buried in the rubble. When the lieutenant returns with the object Frederick's memory is tickled. It is a blanket. He has the feeling it is not just any blanket, but he can't remember what exactly the blanket means. Is it the saviour of society, some horrible and ancient weapon, or just a cheaply made polyester and cotton blended comforter that serves no other purpose than to keep one's feet warm?